How to do anger management with kids

Anger – The feeling of antagonism when something goes against our wish is called anger. Or in simple words the negative emotions we feel when someone deliberately does something against our wish is known as anger.

It is rightly said that “Anger does not solve anything but can destroy everything”. Especially while dealing with kids it becomes crucial to have a balanced approach towards parenting.
Nowadays it has become challenging for parents to understand the nuances of parenting when it comes to teaching children about anger management.

Family is the first learning institution for children, and when the family members do not preach harmony, they can not teach harmony either. So what should be the right approach to manage the sudden surge of any emotion in kids?
Well, the most effective way is to start an open conversation with them. Only when you will make them feel loved and respected, they are going to listen to you. Asking simple questions like What is the one thing that makes them furious and how you can help them to navigate the process of managing those emotions goes a long way.

Most of the time parents try to manage the aggression of kids by giving punishment. Sometimes even trying to tame them with physical actions. This only makes things worse in the long run. Not only do they continue to show anger and annoyance but it becomes a part of their personality as they grow older. Peace is not just a word but a powerful weapon against anger any day. Even we as adults get emotional when treated with love and respect, imagine what impact is it going to make on your children if you deal with them with patience.

A holistic approach to lead an example for your kids is to simply preach what you are trying to teach. As cliche as it may sound, it is probably the only way to inculcate happy and healthy behavioral habits in them. The approach also includes teaching a complete way of being to your kids. From healthy food habits to practicing ‘minimalism and teaching them the importance of values like sharing and caring. The most important all is to take care of your mental health. Only if you are happy you can make others happy.

For example – If your kids are fighting for a new toy even though they already have a lot of them what you can do is become their playmate to understand where it is coming from. Sometimes just making a clear point to them can help them to understand the difference between a need and a want.

For the little ones, their parents and family are their whole world. If they prove to be good human beings, children are going to adopt those precious life values from them. Sometimes acting firmly can make them realize your place as a mentor in their life. Bonds build on trust are often stronger than the ones built on fear. When you show love, children are willing to listen to you not just with ears but with an open heart.

How to deal with a hyperactive kid

It is said that the “best way to make children good is to make them happy” Children are beautiful in their way and what makes them even more beautiful is happiness when their uniqueness is adored and not perceived as a flaw.

If your kid moves around a lot, enjoys problem-solving by doing things, and does not prefer reading chances are there that he or she is a kinesthetic child. But let me tell you one thing, you do not have to worry about it. Kinesthetic or hyperactive kids tend to have a lot more energy as compared to the other kids. The only thing you have to do is to help them channel it in the right direction.

Here is what you can do to make it easier for kids if they are showing kinesthetic behavior.

  • Embracing their personality – First thing to do is to make them feel comfortable in the family and outside. Accept that their behavior is not aggressive but they have an extra amount of energy. Even in school, you can discuss this with their teachers about it. It makes them feel confident and eases things out for them. On the other hand, if you try to tame them, it is possible that they might start showing aggressive behavior because of the frustration of not being understood.
  • Proper activity planning – It is obvious that if a child has more energy then he will try to find ways to use that energy. What parents can do is they can plan their activities to balance out things. For example- Try to build firm bedding and mattress for your kid. It makes sure that even if they are spending a lot of their energy doing things like jumping around and playing, they will not get hurt. Also using the energy with the help of props like a trampoline, or skidpad, and even installing pags on the wall is going to help them a lot. It also helps them to build muscle strength from an early stage. Try to plan activities that involve running and jumping like a sack race, these activities will help them to use their energy productively.

All this makes sense until kids reach a certain age. Once they reach the age of around 13-14, either they will choose outer activities or activities that require mental energy instead of physical energy. It is to be noted that it is not necessary that if your child is hyperactive he or she will choose physical activities. There are a lot of kids who excel in indoor games even after being kinesthetic. Kinesthetic kids are also attracted to games like chess and learning computer skills.

Hyperactive kids tend to be very sharp-minded, therefore some kids prefer using their mental energy. But not everyone can understand that this is their innate quality. Of, course it can be handled productively but not removed from their personality. Even teachers sometimes try to hold them back. When this happens kids tend to adopt depressive behavior as they do not feel accepted for who they are. You can not turn an apple into a banana. You can only improve its quality. So if your kid is hyperactive, you do not have to control his energy instead you can use his unique quality to nurture his talents.

How to make your child responsible?

We all know responsibility peaks when an individual becomes a parent. And with that awareness comes a concern to teach your kid the real meaning of responsibility. As defined by the law of nature animal babies become self-sufficient the moment they take birth. Also, it is a well-known fact that mother nature is the best teacher. Going by fact, parents can also start teaching their kids what responsibility actually means. If not immediately, after the age of 3 infants can easily adopt small habits that can make them responsible human beings.

Responsibility is not a magic trick that one can learn overnight, but a versatile concept that helps kids to become mature human beings. Likewise, if parents start early, it becomes easier for kids to grasp the essence of awareness and responsibility slowly and steadily.

Following are some ways that can help you to teach your kid how to become a responsible person.

  • Household chores – Nowadays parents prefer to not bother kids with anything other than studies and extracurriculars. But the reality is that if you involve your kids while doing household chores, it is going to help them become aware of their responsibility as a part of the family. Serving snacks to guests makes them confident in front of other people. Similarly doing their dishes and sorting clothes makes them aware of the importance of team work while performing any task.
  • Sorting and sequencing – Sorting clothes and utensils help kids to sharpen their minds and develop organizational skills. It is a great way to teach them Once they learn how to do sorting properly teach them the concept of organizers. To put everything in its pre-decided place. It might sound like a regular boring activity but these small habits go a long way. They become habitual in doing tasks properly and in sequence. It also helps them gain clarity about the importance of planning and execution in life.
  • Bonding over evening walks – Conversations are a great way to start bonding with your kids. And once they become comfortable, it becomes very easy for parents to talk to them about important life lessons. Going for evening walks in public places and talking to them about life, in general, brings a lot of positive changes in their behavior. When they see people doing hard work to earn money, they automatically adopt the practice of being grateful for what they already have.
  • Weekly thanksgiving – ‘Gratitude is the best attitude’, children follow what they see. Therefore if family members start being thankful to each other for their contribution towards building the family, kids start valuing the efforts of each family member. This works like magic in building long lasting relationships among family members.

Entrusting kids to complete small tasks individually is very important to make them feel responsible. Also acknowledging their efforts and appreciating them for completing tasks motivate them to perform better. This does not only apply when they do household chores but to all the other aspects of life too. With confidence and independence, they become better performers in life. It all adds up to the process of personality building while bringing good balance of Emotional Intellignece and Intelliogence Quotient in their lives.

How to deal with the introverted and extroverted behavior of your child?

Who is an extrovert or an introvert is a matter of perception. To put it into simple words, Extroverts are more likely to spend their time and energy with family and their social circle on the other hand introverts tend to spend more time and energy with their inner circle while enjoying their own company.

Every kid is unique in his or her way. The approach that parents should adopt is to first understand their kids with a holistic approach. Their habits, fears, preferences, joyful moments, and moments when they react out of frustration and irritation. Doing so is going to help them decide how they can work on their kid’s weaknesses and celebrate their strengths.

Both introversion and extroversion are the types of qualities that kids adopt according to their choice of habits and the influence of the external environment. But parents nowadays want their kids to be outgoing and gel up with their peers and social circle to become all-rounder personalities. One thing that they should keep in mind is that the level of introversion and extroversion in youngsters does not affect their ability to lead, communicate or be creative.

What can help parents is to try and work with kids to nourish their personalities. Teaching them important life lessons while respecting their individuality is a win-win situation for both parents and children.

Parents can adopt the following three-step approach for the same.

  • Talking with love and respect – Accepting the personality preference of your kid is a very important aspect of a good parenting style. Embracing their life choices is going to give them the freedom of living life their way, this way they will even listen to you with more patience and respect. Encouraging them to make life choices and helping them to figure out healthy ways to express their thought process is the first step towards building confidence in your child. Social media is a good platform to help them express their thoughts without forcing them to become extroverted.
  • Giving kids their time and space – It might be exciting for parents to see their kids become extroverts but it is often overwhelming for introverted kids to mold themselves into another personality type. Parents can plan trips and activities for their introverted kids that they enjoy doing. For example, if your kid has a fear of heights, instead of forcing them to win over it, work with them and encourage their efforts. It will give them the confidence to express their emotions with clarity. Even while dealing with family and friends, parents should give kids a chance to talk according to their comfort.
  • Teaching them to take one step at a time- Spending time alone can sometimes bring in overwhelming and even depressing reactions. This can lead to low self-esteem, in such times taking charge and having conversations,to make them comfortable is going to strengthen their bond with you. Even enrolling them in social clubs and encouraging them to learn how to start simple conversations is a great start for them to learn the art of communication.

Like each flower has its beauty, every kid is beautiful and unique in his or her way. Understanding your kid and commenting on their habits while respecting their individuality is the best way to nurture their god-gifted talents. Do not force them to be your way but give them the liberty to find their way is an invaluable gift that you can give to your child.

The best morning routine for your kids

It is a dream of every parent that their child becomes self-disciplined and values their upbringing with respect. But when it comes to the bigger picture, the foundation that parents build from early childhood makes all the difference.

If they do not pay attention to how they are molding the structure of life for their kids, later on, it becomes difficult to change their habits. So it is very important to teach them the value of inculcating certain qualities in life. Like healthy eating habits, punctuality, and setting a consistent daily routine.

Kids can easily adopt these qualities in their lives if they follow a proper morning routine every day with a positive attitude. It is rightly said that “what you do today can improve all your tomorrow”.

You can start by teaching your kids to follow a five-step routine right from the time when they wake up until they leave for school. It is as follows.

  1. Reconnecting with the family – First things first it is very important to express gratitude for a new day. For that, you can teach them to wish good morning to the family members with a bright smile on their faces. Also to pray by looking in their hands and asking for blessings from God and from elders to start the day on a fresh note.
  2. The morning ritual after waking up – Once they are up, you can tell them to organize their bed and to take blessings from mother earth to stay grounded in life. After that, they can have a glass of lukewarm water and can apply saliva to their eyes. It is said to have done miracles when it comes to health benefits.
  3. Stretch-Stretch and Stretch- A Great way to start the day is always by doing some kind of stretching exercise. For the same, you can set a quick 10 minutes stretching routine for them. Doing asanas like tadasana, and walking on their heels for a few minutes is going to energize them for the whole day.
  4. The bath time routine – Kids can start by using homemade toothbrushes. After that, you can teach them kriyas like (Gandusha kriya) to fill water in the mouth while cleaning the eyes and taking bath. It is very important to moisturize the body, and natural products like coconut oil are great for the skin. You can even tell them to apply coconut oil in naval, all this is said to have great health benefits for kids.
  5. Breakfast – It is said to be the most important. Being thankful for the food on the plate and eating with gratitude provide nourishing effects to the body.

When they leave for school, you can give them food to feed stray animals and even some flour and sugar in a small container to feed ants. This makes them compassionate human beings.

We all know that small habits make a big difference in the long run. When you follow the same routine for yourself, your kids will learn the same thing. After all, you can only teach what you preach.

There are times when they don’t follow what you say but getting frustrated should never be the way for parents. It creates a strained relationship with your kids. Rather you can build a healthy environment for them by practicing these rituals together. It also acts as a solid foundation for a parent-child bond. When kids learn self-respect and discipline it increases their self-esteem and hence they start valuing themselves. They become aware of their self-worth. And this is a foundation step towards building a self-disciplined life for your kids.